RIP Flattus Maximus

[Drunk Monk]

In Music by Joel FreimarkSep 18, 2014
GWAR annoints Vulvatron as new frontwoman

In a year when women are being openly threatened and brutally abused all across the media, GWAR is putting them in their rightful place: at the front of the band.

In a surprise announcement, the goliaths of metal have named Vulvatron as their new lead singer, following in the footsteps of the iconic Oderus Urungus and making her perhaps the biggest female frontwoman on Earth.

The band clearly understood that the man under the Oderus costume, Dave Brockie, couldn’t possibly be replaced after his passing earlier this year, so they found the perfect way to keep the band going, which would have undoubtedly been Brockie’s wish. The placement of Vulvatron (played by Kim Dylia) at the front will breathe an entirely new life and attitude into the band; but don’t think she’s a tame choice by any stretch of the imagination.

Described as “a spiky purple Amazon,” Vulvatron will proudly shoot (fake) blood out of her prosthetic breasts, raising the stakes in terms of GWAR’s legendary stage shows. Furthermore, her outward stage appearance is very much in line with her bandmates, and from the attitude already shown, it’s clear she’ll be keeping her fellow miscreants in line each show.

Yet one cannot praise GWAR enough for making the choice to have a female frontwoman. While women have always had a proud place within the heavier sounds, to pick Vulvatron as the successor to the throne of GWAR is beyond colossal, and it reflects the rapidly changing demographic within metal audiences. Along with that, her massive, imposing figure will serve as a new beacon for female empowerment across all forms of music, and yet at the same time she is clearly on the exact same level as her male counterparts.

So kudos to GWAR for making a very fitting and powerful choice for their new frontwoman, and let it serve as a warning to all: GWAR is back, and Vulvatron is on duty. Misogynists beware! Your days are numbered!

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