Hollywood

[Drunk Monk]

By this point, my sense of time was getting a little distorted. I didn't really have that many black labels, but running only on lunch (which was copious actually) and nerves, it hit me harder than it should have. So my tale will now become less linear and only validate-able by Greg's fine fotography.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

I'm guessing it's all lies.

[Drunk Monk]

So just when Greg is getting super fed up with Dm's dilly-dallying, Charles Collier sidles up to our wallflower table and starts chatting us up. Who is he? The Pres of AMC. Greg and I are trying to suppress our awe. And he's really nice, or at least projects that to us in a surprisingly authentic fashion. It was actually very illuminating as he confirmed my suspicions that this is very much about the Asian market (Into the Badlands did get picked up for simultaneous premiere in Hong Kong and some other Asian territories, but still not mainland PRC yet). He seemed very earnest about wanting to tap the martial market, but maybe he just knew how to chat me up. I was very pleased that I could tell him something he didn't know - that Daniel Wu's Go Away Mr. Tumor was swapped out with Wolf Totem for PRC's submission for the Oscars foreign category. Gigi watched this on YouTube of Youku or something (never can be quite sure with her as she never finishes her sentences). She said it was okay but today's films something something different oh bad cat sit stay hello?

Next installment, the starlets (finally!)

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

This story won't be finished before the premiere. And I really wanted to know how it turned out.

[Drunk Monk]

The gaps in your memories are increasing.

You know it, brother. You know it. That's why I take you along, to take photos and document stuff.

Like the most excellent photos you took of some of the stars with my ugly mug....in this - <!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://www.kungfumagazine.com/ezine/article.php?article=1265">http://www.kungfumagazine.com/ezine/art ... ticle=1265</a><!-- m --> - which is now properly credited for photos.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

How is it the DM gets away with photobombing a picture in an article he wrote? I should have photoshopped him the hell out!



So, yeah, the DM flew into town to attend the premiere, (using the term loosely) and attend the after party for the TV show ‘Into the Badlands’. It was more of a faux premiere than a real premiere. It had already screened in New York at Comic Con, so the nerdscape was already clued into it. And if it had been an actual premiere premiere they would have done it at a theater. In case you didn’t know this, but Los Angeles has one or two theaters scattered around that we could have used. But no.

I tried to explain my reasoning to the DM as we hunted along San Vincente Blvd for the London Hotel. That should have been the clue right there. The screening was at a hotel. DM wasn’t buying it. It was a real premiere in a real place.

Yeah, no. The screening room held about 90 people. When I went into check the room, the majority of the chairs were already reserved for cast and crew. There were about twenty spots for the press. Most of those spots remained empty during the screening.

The hotel was quite nice, replete with plenty of hipster touches that you would expect from a boutique hotel in West Hollywood. I know the DM was enamored with all things fuzzy but my vote had to go to the full size ceramic bull dogs used as door stops.

In the run-up to the screening, DM and I wandered the halls looking for our friend, Trouble. We briefly wandered into the cocktail room to see why all the stars were being ushered in there. Basically, to keep them from the hoi polloi . Even at this sketchy of a shindig there was a velvet rope area. Nothing makes stars happier than knowing they were inside the velvet rope rather than outside of it.

DM fell into conversation with the wife of some producer or such. Since it was my job to shoot rather than talk, I was outside the sphere of conversation. Occasionally, DM and the woman would look to me for confirmation or agreement and I would just nod my head and feign enthusiasm for their points of view.

As I was sitting there, I did catch a glimpse of what I thought was a legitimate star in our midst. I didn’t recognize anyone at this point, but this burly man walked by who I thought for sure was Jon Favreau, the man who gave us Iron Man and Chef. The sketchiness of this premiere had just decreased a few notches.

To make it more premiere like, the organizers had set up a photo shoot area in the small hallway between the lobby and the screening room. There was an AMC backdrop with the show title. Someone had set up a few lights. For some inexplicable reason, there was a riser for hoards of people to stand on.

While we were luxuriating in the fuzzy chairs, the photographers, of which there were 3, had staked out their spots for the grand parade of actors. I arrived after so I took a spot kind of behind them, next to the official AMC photographer.

Then they lined up the talent and pushed them past the flashing bulbs of the photographers. One of the new girls, Ally Ioannides, looked completely overwhelmed by the barrage of flashes. The rest just sauntered by us like pros. I quickly learned to raise my hand to get the actors and actresses to direct their gaze towards me. I’m sure my suit and tie made me look important. I made friends with the AMC photographer by allowing him to stand in my spot for group shots. I guess courtesy is unheard of at these events in the jockeying for position.

Basically, this whole charade was so the AMC photographer could get the publicity shots like it was an actual premiere. We all deferred to him so he could get his pictures first and then we were given a few minutes to get our pictures. I never found out who the other people were shooting for or maybe they were just freelancers. Access Hollywood was there recording interviews.

We sat in comfy chairs for the screening. I was thinking with the time given, they could have shown us a couple of episodes but they elected to go with one. Have I mentioned there was no reason for DM to be here since he’d already seen the show online? Ah, the lure of starlets and Hollywood.

The show was fine, nothing earthshaking. Everyone in it was too serious. The show could really use some yucks to lighten up the mood. But I guess since that tone works for Walking Dead, it should work for Badlands, too.

Yes, DM gives me grief for saying that seeing the house for 12 years a slave in the show was my biggest complaint, but if you saw the Eiffel Tower in the middle of a western, you’d say something, too. It was also the only comment I could make in mixed company. I didn’t want to get us ostracized by letting loose some of my other comments in mixed company.

The party was held in the little room where the stars were hanging before the screening. In the light, I was able to confirm that Jon Favreau was indeed here. There were only two other photographers roaming the reception, one of which was the AMC photographer. I basically followed him around all night, taking the group shots he had just taken.

Oddly, when I was photographing the Jon Favreau group, the third photographer asked why I wanted a picture of Favreau. Was he important? Um. . . . .

As the only press at the party, it felt a little bit awkward. Probably should have gotten DM a camera so he wouldn’t be the only writer there. We did get cornered by Ioannides mom, or I should say DM did. Once again, I was just far enough away that I couldn’t hear a word they said. But they did go on for a long time, probably the longest conversation of the night. Good thing it was of zero importance.

DM and I mingled. Or I should say, DM and I skirted the edges of the party drinking Bushmills and water. I kept prompting DM to talk to the women he was so fond of. But a lot of the actors and actresses seemed to just want to enjoy themselves and reconnect after shooting had ended.

We did talk to the young male lead. I photographed them. We barely talked to Stephen Fung, who was the one person DM really wanted to talk to since he was the fight choreographer for the show. Yeah, he could have cared less for our schtick and broke off with us as soon as possible.


I think the ice finally broke for us when the President of AMC, noticing us standing by ourselves at a table, came over to us to talk. My first thought was doesn’t he know he is the president of AMC and doesn’t have to talk to us? But he did. And we talked for a good long time. This was one of the conversations I was present for. I even chimed in on a few questions. The one I remember was why only six episodes? He mentioned that that was how Walking Dead started. I did not drop my I worked with (or for, if you want to get technical) Gale Ann Hurde, the producer of Walking Dead.



After that, we talked to the rest of the female cast. DM’s dream came true and he got his photograph with Emily Beecham. We talked for anothe good chunk of time rwith Madeleine Mantock, who looked nothing like her character in the show. But she had on the most amazing dress, that I’m going to say because no one can really verify it, that DM, yes DM, couldn’t take his eyes off. It was from Madeline we heard the butt double story. It was also Madeleine who earlier in the evening for reasons known only to her, offered to get me a drink. Channeling my Faux Pax kid, I declined and quickly scurried away.



It was like the actresses didn’t have their dealing with press persona down, yet. They all talked to us a lot. They had great stories to share with us. It was the opposite of Nuke Laloosh’s final interview. It was also the opposite of the jerk Stephen Fung’s interview.

All told, the evening was a success. I took lots of pictures. I misheard or ignored plenty of interviews. And I got a photograph of Jon Favreau. Hmm, maybe I should be more excited that I got photographs of Madeleine Mantock.



And the final adventure involved Dani the dog. DM doesn’t believe the story but I no longer trust his ability to recount events.

I get up early to walk the dogs. I’m moving through the house in the dark so as not to awake DM, who sleeps on the couch in the living room. Well, the dogs are surprised by the lump on the couch and go to investigate. Maeve’s form of investigation involves a lot of barking.

Dani goes right up to the strange shape. Then I heard loud exhalation of breath accompanied by a whoof sound as if something really heavy has just landed on DM’s chest. I know what makes that sound because I make that sound when Dani jumps on my chest when I am lying on the couch.

When DM wakes up later, I apologize for the mishap with Dani. DM doesn’t know what I’m talking about. He vaguely remembers being disturbed by the dog, but it does not include a chest thump.

Who are you going to believe?

So, that’s the end, no thanks to DM for which this memory has already been obliterated in a fog of late nights, illegal substances and alcohol. We had to leave it to the photographer to finish up the writing.

[Drunk Monk]

...well, maybe not federally, but legal in CA....soon come.

Which reminds me. Aramis Knight. Dumbest stage name ever. It's like something Scapino would think up (yeah, I'm calling him out here on a regular basis in some vain effort to get him to post here. It's not like he has anything else to do 'cept watch the twins). Anyway, Aramis was in some major YA pic, Ender's Game was it? Didn't see it. I maybe wrong. My memory these days, I swear.... I nabbed Aramis as he cut across the bar and we chatted a bit. He struck me as exactly like you imagine a young dashing star might be. He said his athletic background was in basketball, which raised a red flag because he's really short. And then the pic he took with me (so masterfully shot by master photographer Greg), Aramis is pointing at me with the 'this guy' finger. Oh bother. Out selfied by the young star with the stupid stage name. I'm going to try use that 'this guy' finger when people as me to take pics with them for selfies at tournaments and such in the future.

Next installment, the starlets (finally!)

Watch Into the Badlands tonight! I know I won't. I've seen it twice already.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Saw the second episode of Badlands last night.

I might be off the Badlands Bandwagon. It's really badly written. All the dialogue is very expository. "So, tell me about yourself"

They need to learn to get a little texture in their shots. Everything in the atmosphere is too clean.

The fight scene against the hundred bad guys in the abandoned factory was just silly. Why don't we just stand back and throw things at Sonny? And everyone is so serious. I vote for a touch of levity.

And finally, the Widow lives in the same house as the Baron only redressed and repainted. I told you using a house with as a distinctive feature as double exterior staircase was a bad idea( I talked with Lyndell about this. He was completely on my side). Or maybe all the Barons built themselves the same house so they would know they were the Barons? Or bought that house at the Baron store.

[Drunk Monk]

....all I can remember is that I flew home smelling of dames and dogs.

I was going to rant about chatting up Madeleine. Maybe I still will. That was the highlight of the evening, after talking to the AMC pres. And here I had my sights on Emily.

I'll see the show through. I'm halfway through it. I'm a sucker for sword hotties. It did get picked up by a legitimate China distributor but the fate of Season 2 remains unclear.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

FWIW, I'm watching the show and I'm entertained enough. I will fast-forward to the the next fight sometimes.

[Drunk Monk]

So last Thursday, I had lunch with Daniel Wu. 

It was wacky. Chinese girls were swooning. A tkd masters Taiwanese wife swooned in the parking lot. Our Chinese office women and IT guy (kind of a woman) swooned. At claim jumper, where I take our honored guests like Bas Ass Bunnies) some Chinese women at another table swooned. Never seen so much Chinese swooning before.

We had a great chat. He's really sharp and down to earth. And handsome.
And that voice....swoon. Oh wait, what am I saying? I'm not an IT guy.

Next time...the starlets!

[Greg]

What is a Bas Ass Bunny?

[Drunk Monk]

Bass bun dummy?

[Drunk Monk]

Emily just sexted me.  Into the Badlands just got renewed for season 2.  She wants me to come over and help her celebrate.

[Greg]

Wake up, DM. You're texting from your dreams again.