Schmidt Sting Pain index

[thatguy]

Reposting from FB. Can't remember who posted it originally. Hope it wasn't one of you rabble...

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Schmidt Sting Pain Index
Index - Animal - Description
1.0 - Sweat bee - Light, ephemeral, almost fruity. A tiny spark has singed a single hair on your arm.
1.2 - Fire ant - Sharp, sudden, mildly alarming. Like walking across a shag carpet and reaching for the light switch.
1.8 - Bullhorn acacia ant - A rare, piercing, elevated sort of pain. Someone has fired a staple into your cheek.
2.0 - Bald-faced hornet - Rich, hearty, slightly crunchy. Similar to getting your hand mashed in a revolving door.
2.0 - Yellowjacket - Hot and smoky, almost irreverent. Imagine W. C. Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue.
2.0 - Honey bee and European hornet - Like a matchhead that flips off and burns on your skin.
3.0 - Red harvester ant - Bold and unrelenting. Somebody is using a drill to excavate your ingrown toenail.
3.0 - Paper wasp - Caustic and burning. Distinctly bitter aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of hydrochloric acid on a paper cut.
4.0 - Tarantula hawk - Blinding, fierce, shockingly electric. A running hair drier has been dropped into your bubble bath.
4.0+ - Bullet ant - Pure, intense, brilliant pain. Like fire-walking over flaming charcoal with a 3-inch rusty nail grinding into your heel.

--tg

[cranefly]

My first thought was, Will they mention the bullet ant?

Yep, top of the list. Lady Cranefly and I saw them in the Amazon a few years back. Our guide Segundo pointed them out to us. This may sound insane, but I regret not having experienced their bite. As you can see, among pain connoisseurs they are tops. Not that I'm a pain connoisseur, but... What I heard was that they feel like being shot with a bullet. Thus the name. I presume that means that someone who got shot with a bullet also got bit by a bullet ant and experienced a sense of deja vu all over again.

[Drunk Monk]

We had to crawl under a log that had fallen across the trail when hiking from a camp during a whitewater trip down the river Pacuare in Costa Rica. The log had a trail of bullet ants marching across it. The guide, who was this loincloth barefoot native boy that was a genuine Tarzan or Mowgli pointed to them and said "careful. bad bite. you lose arm." Bullet ants are freaking huge, like the size of your thumb (when they say bullets, they mean like rifle bullets).

A little way further up the trail we came face to face with a fer de lance. We forgot all about the bullet ants.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Maybe stay away from the pain causers?

[El Dingo]

This subject should be explored more by involuntary subjects, meaning, not by torture but by real-world surveys.

My worst pain was having two fingernails ripped out by a door closing with my fingers on the jamb.

What is that pain compared to childbirth or having to watch a Justin Beiber concert or "Twilight" marathon?