my father

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

What Greg said, except about skype. The second scariest section is the "I'm more injured than you" section.

[cranefly]

I'm more local, sort of (after your move), so if you need transportation help, or a physical presence, let me know.
I'll do my best to accommodate.
Really, just let me know.

[Drunk Monk]

My dad spent last night at El Camino hospital. His sodium levels were all messed up and there was issues with his kidneys. They had him for tests and observation. My mom spent all yesterday there. This morning, her car wouldn't start. It's at some AAA shop now. She got a ride to the hospital from AAA and they are picking her up to get her back to her *hopefully* repaired car. My dad will spend tonight in the hospital too. They think it is a swelling of a growth near his prostate, and will probably send him home tomorrow with a bucket of antibiotics. I'm going to spend the next few days at my folks to help out.

Thanks for your offers, guys. I do appreciate it.

[El Dingo]

Your dad was especially kind to me during a rough time. If there is anything I can do to repay him just call. I'm happy to drive down if your mom needs anything.

[Drunk Monk]

His doctor called me. He is transferring my dad to a nursing home for a week, until the urologist can clear his foley cath and get better PT. My parents' house, if you'll remember, has a lot of stairs. The front door landing is elevated so getting him around in this state would be difficult. The CAT revealed an odd spot on my Dad's prostate, which his Doc thinks might be an infection, so he's putting him on antibiotics. My mom says he ate well today, but is walking a little sideways. The nursing home is near El Camino Hospital. He'll be transferred this afternoon.

Thanks for your offers, guys. There's not much to be done at this point. As I've been a writer for twelve years now, I process a lot through writing. It is my therapy, so just listen to my ramblings like usual, and that is plenty of support.

I'll be staying in S'vale tonight again. It's really weird staying in my old room, which is now jam packed full of storage boxes, but still has a large poster of Stevie on the sliding closet door.

[Drunk Monk]

Dad is resting at a nursing home where he is to receive some P.T. He's alert and engaged, but weak from the ordeal. He still has the foley catheter, and that, plus his mobility, will determine if he can be released in a week. The insurance pays for a week. Any more comes out of our pockets and facilities of this type run about $250 a day. My mom is skeptical he will be able to return home in a week. We discussed building some ramps for the two-step stairs that form the landing at our front door. It's a quirky bit of the architecture of our house - the landing is elevated by two steps for no good reason.

On a side note, I knew the home because for a short stint, I worked as a Med Lab driver, a job I got through LB when I was in college. Mountain View and Palo Alto were on my route, so I know the insides of a lot of those homes. The smell brought me right back, and that was over a quarter century ago now.

[Drunk Monk]

My mom says my dad has been getting belligerent, as he hates to be in nursing homes. He wants to come home. Tomorrow, my mom and I will meet with the Doc, the PT, the social worker and whoever else to discuss options. My mom believes they will recommend that we institutionalize him.

I will stay in S'vale again tonight, but I'm going to attend that screener of Grandmaster at the Metreon SF. Ironically, I had planned to take tomorrow off as my folks were going to come down to the Cruz to see our bungalow. My mom can't drive 17, so my cousins were going to drive her and my dad. We were going to make a day of it.

[Drunk Monk]

I spent all of yesterday at the nursing home. I helped my dad with his PT by playing catch with him with a balloon and progressively bigger balls. It was odd because my dad and I never did that father & son playing catch thing before. Dad was a tool user. He played tennis and golf. He didn't throw and catch, he swung and volleyed. I'm a tool user too, but I preferred to hit people with sticks and swords, not balls (even better when I could hit someone in the balls with a stick or sword). Anyway, my dad is doing progressively better and the nursing home thinks he can return home in a week. He'd use a walker and we'd have to install railings everywhere. My mom, however, is less confident. I think she's still pretty shaken about the initial fall and doesn't feel comfortable being his caretaker anymore. It's been ten years. So we'll see how much he might improve over the next week.

This is so fucking exhausting. I haven't been sleeping well and the commute has been kicking my ass with traffic accidents. Plus I haven't been in Kung Fu for 2-3 months now - my longest break ever - because my school closed. It's making me really angry. Kung Fu is my psychological vent. Just today, I fucked up and deleted a file I needed (it was small so I could rebuild it) but I was so pissed that I went out and kicked the shit out of some flats stored in our parking lot. I should really mount a striking pad here somewhere. Fortunately, I've had a very kind invitation from one of my monk friends to begin training again under him next week. Hopefully, I won't kill anyone before that or break my hand punching out a wall.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Respect, Gene, and peace. One I give to you and the other I wish for you.

[Drunk Monk]

The urologist said the spot on my Dad's prostate has gone down, but his prostate remains so enlarged that he will have to have a foley catheter for the rest of his life, unless surgical measures are taken.

My mom is still debating about if she can handle my dad. Today, he did well with his PT, but we wasn't eating. He was just chewing and chewing. My mom attributes this to dementia. Usually she gives him some water and he swallows everything, but that didn't work so she had to remove the food from his mouth. He had another incontinent episode. The speech therapist tried some exercises with image cards which haven't worked for my dad since the stroke. My mom tried to tell the therapist that this was so, but the therapist insisted based on his umpteen years of experience, and of course, it went nowhere. My mom is exhausted. We're not sure where we will move my dad yet, whether it'll be home with extra help and added banisters, or to a nursing home. We have until midweek next week, unless the doctors order continued specialized care.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

excrutiating choices. i'm sorry that you have to make them.

[Drunk Monk]

...although it's looking as if Dad will come home. We might have bannisters installed and convert our guest bedroom downstairs to his 'hospital' bed, and then hire some assistant caretakers. It's cheaper than a nursing home, and surely more comfortable. Not sure about our deadline either.

I took T to visit my Dad yesterday. He seemed more alert, but he's still wheelchair bound. There's a little courtyard with a bunny hutch in the middle. T liked that. At one point, my dad mumbled several incoherent syllables ending with 'bunnies'. That was remarkable, not just for the bunnies part but because he seldom strings together more than a four syllables. He is still wheelchair bound although he walked around the facility with his PT on Saturday.

[Drunk Monk]

The doctor doesn't see enough improvement and my mom doesn't think he is manageable. She has begun the insurance application process to pay for a nursing home. He's been having good days and bad days. Not sure when the transfer will happen exactly.

The doc thinks my dad has another year maybe.

[Drunk Monk]

They think it was a side effect of the first antibiotic for the prostate spot. Now he's on another antibiotic for the pnuemonia, plus an IV drip, probably for hydration. They called my mom at 11PM on Tuesday night to get permission for the med change. My mom goes to sleep at 8:30. I'm pretty worried about my mom now too, as she'll be living alone in that big old house now. Her neighbors are really good fortunately, and check to see that she picks up the newspaper and such. I'll be by there tonight.

I'm totally exhausted. Today is the deadline for our new issue, so I'll catch a break for the holiday weekend. Next week, T starts high school, so there's a lot of tension at home over that. Fortunately, I'll be back at Kung Fu tomorrow, which will hopefully be invigorating and alleviating.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Shouldn't you be hiring the Yeti's brother at this point? He seems to be pretty good at the in home health care worker gig.

I hope you get a break from your troubles. It sounds like you are under a lot of stress as well.