The Move to Awahnee

[Greg]

If I told you where I live, then you would know where to find me.

So, come find me:
35851 Misty Ridge Ct
Raymond, CA 93653

I was going to send postcards with the new address just to be completely dorky.

[Greg]

I'm beginning to question the experience level of my Oakhurst Real Estate Agents.

One of the things that set off some of the Monday panic was the note from said agents that we would have to come to Oakhurst on Thursday to sign all the papers. Well, the Queen can't do a quick jaunt up to Oakhurst. She has that JOB. But also, I had explained to them that we are working with an escrow company down here that was more than happy to play notary for us. I emailed the mortgage people. I emailed my agent. I did my chicken with my head cut off dance.

I just got off the phone with the Oakhurst Escrow agent. There was never any need for us to come to Oakhurst. She was all set to send a mobile notary to us here in Los Angeles. There was never any plan to do anything else. And now that I think about it, I have always had a mobile notary come to me.

To reiterate, I have some suspicions about the competency of my agents.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Yeah, but you can flip that property like real fast, man!

[Drunk Monk]

Hold the phone... I want to see your chicken with your head cut off dance.

Or were you being metaphorical?

[Greg]

Um, maybe

[Greg]

I currently own two homes. As the Queen informed me, this isn't the first time.

[Drunk Monk]

you own ‘em, or you have the mortgages?

[Greg]

Okay. I have two mortgages.

But come next week, around Wednesday or so, I will have only one house and no mortgages.

[Greg]

Ah, panic. Am I the only one that has this much moving/house buying drama? Do I seek it or does it find me.

So, the dance of the moving containers. UNITS couldn't move their container because of broken equipment. Fine. PODS dumped their unit at the bottom of the driveway. It was small enough it didn't block my neighbors driveway. Well, not much. (All my neighbors hate us at this point because of the constant presence of the container in front of the house.)

I hired Patriot Movers for two hours starting at 8 on Thursday to basically load the small pod with all the crap in the garage. All the very heavy heavy crap (Yes, there was a sawzall)

I had scheduled the POD for a quick turn around. They were going to drop it off Wednesday and pick it up Thursday. I figured they could pick it up any time after 11am once the thing was loaded.

I received a call PODS saying they would be picking up the POD between 8am and 11am. Careful readers will note this is also the time that we would be loading the POD. It would be kind of tricky to be loading the POD at the same time they were taking it away. This was all done via robo-call. No humans need respond. I called into the humans line to see if I could delay it. They said no. They were booked solid. How about it if they picked up on Friday. That would be great except for the fact the UNIT box was going to be switched out that day. It would be very tricky to doing the POD/UNIT dance at the same time.

The POD person checked the delivery schedule. The earliest they would be at my house was 9:30. Give or take thirty minutes. If they were late, I was gold. If they were early, well I didn't want to think what would happen if they were early. I rolled the dice. I let the pick up for Thursday.

Naturally, the UNITS peopled called and said they were ready to pick up their UNIT on Thursday. I explained it would probably be really hard for them to grab it since it was currently being blocked in by the POD. They said they would come on Friday.

I woke up at midnight and went through my decision tree of packing the POD and what needed to be done.

At around 6:30 I started pulling stuff out of the garage and putting it in the driveway to make it easier to load. I had a big pile of stuff strewn down the driveway by the time the movers showed up. It took them about twenty minutes to load it all up. I scurried around the house filling up boxes for them to load into the POD. I startled every time I heard a truck engine in front of the house.

But my movers did a great job. They got way more stuff into the POD than I thought was possible. 

Just as they wrapped up, I got the call from PODS saying the driver was on his way. Sweet!

I'm very tired right now.

[Drunk Monk]

I will have only one house and no mortgages.

[Greg]

I have now signed up for all my utilities. And I have cancelled all my utilities.

In unsurprising news, the current Misty Ridge homeowners are behind in their garbage collection bill.

[Drunk Monk]

Don’t tell us...

Vehicle broke down on the way and in desperation, you were eaten by your hounds? 

I hope not. Been planning on your new digs as a backpacking staging zone. 

Cuz it’s all about me.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

I’ve been planning on Gene being able to stage his back country safaris from your new place, because it is all about DM.

I also hope that your move is going better than planned.

[Drunk Monk]

Just remember

DOOM = DM with some OO in the middle, kinda like the cream filling in your eclair.



Have I succeeded in hijacking this thread yet?

[Greg]

When hasn't it been about DM? I'm sure he was planting subliminal messages for this Yosemite base for his use for years.

Did I mention the six feral cats on the property?

Did I mention almost running out of gas and getting lost on the way to the gas station?