It's my martial arts world

[Drunk Monk]

But srsly now. Where are these new emojis?

[Greg]

They aren't coming out until OS 14 which I believe drops in September.

[thatguy]

You can install the public seed of iOS 14 on your iPhone now. https://beta.apple.com/sp/betaprogram/

I'm not sure if the new emoji are in there yet, or what happens if you send one to someone that doesn't have that emoji on their phone. Probably it will explode their device.

--tg

[Drunk Monk]

Probably it will explode their device.

Now that's some serious ninja action there. 

Ninjas in action. Did I ever tell you that KFTC tale?

[cranefly]

You mean about the exploding ninja -- where all the body-parts stayed invisible?

[Drunk Monk]

‘Ninjas in action’ was the title of a Trojan horse someone embedded in the KFM forum in the early years. Opened to hardcore porn. It was a running joke between Patrick & I for years, an early lesson in how to deal with such things (there were several). Every once in a while, either of us might drop the phrase ‘ninjas in action’ to get a chuckle out of the other. Man, I miss sharing an office with him most of all. We still chat every week or so, just to catch up.

---

But back on topic. I just had an old friend message me this: 

Got a question.  My mom has my grandfather's old pole weapons that she wants to get rid of.  They are in pretty bad shape (rusty).  Do you know of anyone who would like them?  They are probably 70+ years old.  Thanks!

He texted a pic of maybe half a dozen rusty Chinese polearm heads. Good stuff. Probably temple weapons. I’m following up.

[Greg]

Excellent. How is it I know so many people who collect old rusty weapons?

Maybe you should just use the ninja-dressed-as-a-pirate emoji for now? We'll all know it's you.

[thatguy]

Sorry...I read that has "hardcore pom"

--tg

[Drunk Monk]

Excellent. How is it I know so many people who collect old rusty weapons?

Maybe you should just use the ninja-dressed-as-a-pirate emoji for now? We'll all know it's you.

I collect old weapons, preferably not rusty. But this one is coming for free. These weapons are being offered to me as long as I find them a forever home, like a feral kitten, only they don't need to be fixed, they just need a little restoration and safeguarding.

Ninjas can dress like anything, you know. Even feral cats.

Sorry...I read that has "hardcore pom"

--tg

Poms rule! 

The other hardcore porn story from TC was even funnier. Did I recount the tale of 'Iron Horse Productions' here yet?

[cranefly]

Is this the one where the ninja exploded but all the body-parts stayed invisible?

[Drunk Monk]

We had some sketchy Chinese DVD duplicator back in the day. He was cheap and turned titles around quickly. We got a video returned from a customer because instead of having our video on it, it had some hardcore gay porn. It started with the title card 'Iron Horse Productions' which seemed innocuous enough, then jumped into graphic anal sex. The client was understanding thankfully. They were going to show it as part of a kid's class. Good thing they previewed it first. Steve Yi - the DOOM dropout who we brought to ED's for a video night in an attempt to enlist him into DOOM, but then ED showed Ichi the Killer and poor Steve couldn't take it (we overestimated his fortitude) - he was working for TC at the time and was tasked with watching all the DVDs of that title to see if there were more, and took great delight in filling out the 'defective product' form writing in the reason as 'hardcore gay porn'. 

Like 'ninjas in action', 'iron horse productions' will always bring a grin to me and Patrick.

[cranefly]

Nice anecdotes.  These sound vaguely familiar.  I think you told me about them as they occurred back in the day.  But it's been a while, and there's been a few cosmic rays pounding on the neurons...

[Drunk Monk]

and there's been a few cosmic rays pounding on the neurons...

See now? Too much Neowise causes early onset dementia. Sure glad I didn't see it.

[Greg]

[Greg]

Ah, with my new super powers, I can now repost the nunchuck bear video. Because that's important and not something we have moved on from.