Bad luck demons?

[The Queen]

Let's tally up what the demons have been doing to me lately, shall we? We won't go back too far, skip over the earlier traumas of the year with Cucuhulain, the sewer, the repeat mammogram, the various items and costs associated with what Maeve has destroyed, etc. We'll just focus on the last 3 weeks.

8/20 - Replace front and rear brakes and timing belt - $1,014.
8/22 - Watch Cubs lose to Dodgers; contract flu bug. Stop sleeping more than 2 hours consecutively during the night.
8/24 - See doctor, get over-the-counter meds - $20.
8/27 - Go to Mobile, Alabama.
8/30 - Come home from Mobile, Alabama; made it thru, but still not well, still not sleeping.
9/1 - Ozzie attacks Preston, Preston attacks Greg. Greg and Cindi go to ER and come home. Greg and Cindi go back to hospital; hospital keeps Greg. Cindi takes Preston to vet, vet keeps Preston.
9/2 - Preston comes home from vet - big bill, but reimbursed by neighbors. Cindi visits Greg in hospital, brings food.
9/3 -Cindi visits Greg in hospital twice, brings food.
9/4 - Maeve steals and eats all of Preston's pain meds and antibiotics. Take Maeve to the emergency vet ER to induce vomiting and go to regular vet for replacement meds for Preston ($381 for ER, $66 for replacement meds). Greg calls for a ride home from the hospital! On the way, I experience the joys of a flat tire on the 5 North during the Friday evening commute.
9/6 - replace 4 tires ($300)
9/8 - replace two cracked engine mounts ($340).
9/9 - do dishes, and discover water pouring out of cabinets below kitchen sink. Cracked hose. Will replace later today. Taking Preston back to vet at 11:20 a.m. for checkup.

I'm thinking of contacting my one Wiccan friend and asking for a ritual or spell to banish the bad luck demons.

[Drunk Monk]

Having just returned from DOOM South this morning, Dm has the most grim news to report. It seems that the glynch has been lying to us, obscuring the horrible truth behind the unspeakable tragedy of what has really happened at DOOM South. Maeve, the demon pup, has devoured the queen. Maeve has begun to devour the glynch and Preston too, as evidenced by their ample bite marks. The glynch is trying to cover it all up with an elaborate tale of deception, but upon closer examination, it all falls apart.

It started out innocently enough. DM & fam came back from their annual fleecing by the mouse (an American tradition asnd despite our hippiepinkoorganicobama leanings, we're still American dammit!) We arrived late to meet the injured glynch, Preston and Maeve. Did you see those cute puppy pics tQ posted on facebook? That wasn't Maeve. It was a gerbil or something. Maeve is a hundred times larger and a bristling example of canine ADD, all tongue and paws. And when Maeve looks at you, she grins, and those demon dimples appear. The glynch or Preston would try to say something, try to pass a note pleaing for help, but Maeve would just stare with those demon dog dimples, grins psychotically, clearly dominating the situation. They were just puppets, puppets of the new queen. The DM fam went into "be cool" mode. T distracted Maeve with a tale of our own creampuff-eating pom. She's good at that since she often has to cover for her dad's silliness. DM and Mrs Dm made discreet plans, which almost came undone as Dm almost lost it on the potty seeing TQ's Oscar laminate collection, thinking what a horrible way to go for her. Then we were out of there before the dawn.

Dm suggests a DOOM task force of tg and ED, both of whom are seasoned with large dogs. Go forth DOOM brothers, and exorcize this demon that has taken over DOOM south!!
nakeman:

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Hey Mr. Dm,
I think you left that thingy behind. You might want to come back and fetch it. I mean get it. Pick it up. It's what I would do. Nothing to worry about here. It's tail wagging heaven here. If we had tails. I mean if the dogs had tails. So, come back. I promise not to bite. I mean it will be safe. Maybe you would like another wet dog wake up? Just come back.

signed,

The Greg

[The Queen]

Not sure the bad luck demons are completely banished just yet. Spent the day catching up on a billion errands, and stopped at Petsmart to pick up puppy food, dog food and kitty litter. Great sale on the 40 pound bucket of kitty litter. Lifted it into the basket and somehow managed to smash and briefly trap my right hand between the bucket and the shopping cart. My hand is only a little swollen and it hardly hurts at all. :roll:

[Drunk Monk]

The Queen is Dead.

Long Live the Queen.

The Glynch is keeping tQ's memory alive here on the forum kind of like Norman Bates did for his mother. We all knew it was going to go that way with the Glynch. We're not fooled by these fake tQ posts.

Maybe you should have named the demon dog after someone other than an evil queen. Maybe you should rename her Dimples.

[The Queen]

I'm not dead yet. I'm not. I think I'll go for a walk. I feel happy. I feel happy...

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Appropriate Python rejoinder passes The Turing Test. She lives!