"B" Movies that are "A" movies

[El Dingo]

DM's review of "Conan" made me think about why I love the 1982 Conan the Barbarian so much.

It was considered a "B" movie at the time. Sword-and-Sorcery flicks were en vogue and it was released along with "Beastmaster", "Sword and the Sorcerer", "Krull" and a hundred others.

The difference was that 'Conan' had Arnie, Max von Sydow, James Earl Jones and the loveable Mako. These fine actors delivered lines like "To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women" as if they were written by Shakespeare. The movie started by making you smirk at the idea of a child growing into a hulking bodybuilder by pushing a mill wheel for twenty years. Then you gradually get drawn into the comic-book narrative until you curse the day Thulsa Doom was born and you celebrate Conan's victory by jumping to your feet and cheering with abandon.

These remakes are trying to modernize the look-and-feel of beloved films for today's audiences without understanding what made them beloved in the first place. People didn't love 'Conan' for the swordfights and special effects. They loved it for the passion everyone involved brought to the screen.

It kills me that there are so many novels, comics and even music albums crying for a movie treatment but instead they are remaking 'Jumanji'.

That reminds me; I have another rant, search for: Paul Williams

[Drunk Monk]

We're there for you on this.

:goodman:

[cranefly]

I am in exorbitant agreement with El Dingo. Maybe not that the original Conan was an A movie, but it's got that whole cult thing going for it. Or maybe it's not quite cultish. But when I catch it being replayed on TV, I am hypnotized by the bad acting combined with the bigger-than-life people doing it, and somehow it all comes together. It's like watching a Godzilla movie and you can see the effing zipper, but slowly there forms in your head the belief that Godzilla is real, and that belief extends beyond the end of the movie. There's a weird chemistry at work in the original Conan and its sequel.

And I also despairingly agree with ED that there are countless science fiction and fantasy story gems just begging to be made into movies, but producers don't want to deal with unproven formulas, they would rather milk the same storyline time and again until the masses march up the mountainside with torches, shouting, "Enough is enough!"

Errr. Sorry about jumping in the ring without an invite. Tag back to ED.

[Drunk Monk]

The original was John Milius. 'nuf said.

[El Dingo]

OK - I was toying with the idea of a 'top 100 B-Movie' list.

Great movies that dropped through the cracks and need to be shoved down the throats of today's teenagers:

Westworld
Death Race 2000
Barbarella
Phantom of the Paradise
Wizards
The In-Laws
The Warriors (sort of got a reboot a few years ago with a video game and remastered DVD)
Don't be Afraid of the Dark
Willard
Dark Star
Zardoz
It's Alive
The Odessa File
Demon Seed
The Legacy
The Changeling
The Other
Being There

...but then I realized the list goes on forever.

The weird thing is, when I go to Target, the t-shirts are designed with Pink Floyd, Frankenberry, Space Invaders and Steve Martin (King Tut). It's like American society conceded that the best pop culture came from the 70's. It's not just MY lawn anymore, it's EVERYONE'S lawn and they can run all over it if they want to.

Someone needs to write a story about teenagers that were born in 1988 but only have memories of growing up in 1978. New Kids on the Block? Who was that? I listened to Led Zeppelin my whole life.

[Drunk Monk]

It's one of my fav RM shirts because it's so ghastly and no one today can figure out wtf it is.

That was like 50K+ screaming adolescent girls. I've never heard such a caterwaul in my life. It was terrifying.