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+--- Thread: The Pets of DOOM (/showthread.php?tid=1167)
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The Pets of DOOM - Drunk Monk - 05-05-2008
Behold, oh sinner, the very beasts of Armageddon are kept hungry and waiting within the bowels of the nefarious abodes of DOOM whose names upon mention causeth trembling amongst the sane and sober so as to be only mentioned in shadows in lowly whispers - ye verily, cast not thine eyes upon the unmentionable denizens of lynch manor, the dark one called preston and the unpronounceable cthulhulain, whose vile and incestuous acts make the most hardcore youtube surfer cringe, and speak not of the carnivorous felines kept in sordid anticipation within the cat cave of the queen, heard and smelled but never seen except by their fast-typing mistress, and try as we may, we cannot forget the unspeakable evil of the hounds of el dingo, whose whip-like tails cause even the most hardened dominatrix to shudder in fear and lose complete bladder control, as they devour all other domesticates in their lair, and surely e.d. and mrs e.d. will soon follow that blood-drenched trail, and then there's the horrid cockroaches of legbone and cranefly, borne from the same defiled stock and exchanged for illicit purposes alone, who are now waiting dormant in egg and larvae form, nestled within greasy unwashed underwear, awaiting that day of judgment, and speaketh of cranefly manor, lousy with bloodthirsty cats that feed upon the flesh of the innocent and idiotic, always ready to pounce upon unsuspecting victims who have fallen from the path of light, and speaketh of legbone, there was that monitor lizard who shitteth most explosively upon its own aquarium, a nasty fecal mix of worms and disease whose horrifying stench made all that inhaled regret the day forever, and of course, the sinister lice of the yeti, that stare out threateningly with their unearthly compound eyes from the dank folds and moldy wet crevices of the yeti's foul and malodorous body preparing to leap to new hosts at the slightest provocation and spread their wickedness across mankind, but yea, behold and fear now the newest bane of man, within the haunted monastery of the drunk monk, joining the most devious cat rebell who never quite forsook her feral ways and continues to mock any afflicted with allergies in ways to drive sanity away and the terrible white rabbit alice, descended from the same voracious beast that once guarded the last words of joseph of arimethea, another creature joins this DOOM army of hades, from the ancient land of pomerania, fear ye now, the hound called jingles.
snicker - Greg_phpbb3_import1 - 05-05-2008
You have a toy named jingles? Low, how the mighty have fallen. (Technically I don't think you can refer to a pomeranian as a hound. I think ratdog is the term you are looking for.)
Congrats on the pooch.
Re: The Pets of DOOM - thatguy - 05-05-2008
Since moving out a year ago, I have been pet-less. I have visitation with the dog sometimes, but mostly I've just had the company of whatever critters that have stumbled into my lair. (I have been documenting these visits. Someday, I will start a blog.)
To stave off loneliness, I just got a guinea pig on Sat. He came pre-monikered as Jasper. I will be training him to battle the other critters that come and go.
--tg
re: Jingles - cranefly - 05-05-2008
Wow. My guess was gonna be a snake.
Talk about being totally clooless. Cloughless? Dang dang dang. Once you start staring at a word, you can never figure out the spelling.
Cthuless?
--cranefly
P.S. Let me know if I'm trying too hard...
- El Dingo - 05-05-2008
Holy Christ I can't even begin to read that!
Commas are the tool of the devil! Paragraphs are your friend.
another mouth to feed, another butt to wipe - Drunk Monk - 05-05-2008
but my kid loves it.
yep, ol' dm has joined the ranks of queen victoria, mozart and paris hilton. you've never seen a dog more cute. it's like a tribble with legs and a face.
Re: another mouth to feed, another butt to wipe - thatguy - 05-05-2008
Drunk Monk Wrote:it's like a tribble with legs and a face.
Hey, so's the guinea pig...
--tg
- Dr. Ivor Yeti - 05-05-2008
...and they're all tasty!
pomeranians are only tasty if you like fur - Drunk Monk - 05-06-2008
this dog is like 90% fur. there's more meat on a hamster.
you can't train a guinea pig to sit.
i'm thinking of getting one of those dog purses like paris hilton, something to match my outfits.
Warning - The Queen - 05-06-2008
No baby talk with this creature. If you ever are heard to utter the sound "-wingles" after saying your dog's name, nothing will ever be enough to restore your manhood.
BEHOLD!!! - Drunk Monk - 05-06-2008
FEAR MY NEW AVATAR!
Jingles is sooooooooooooooo cute.
Mrs Dm took Jingles to a dog groomer. - Drunk Monk - 06-11-2008
Now he smells really nice. He also had a baby blue ribbon attached to his collar, which he seems to enjoy.
soooooooooooo cute.
Poms were bred to be petted.
One other feature - Greg_phpbb3_import1 - 06-11-2008
They remove your masculinity.
Where's your dog love - Greg_phpbb3_import1 - 06-11-2008
I think you people all come in second in dog amour.
![[Image: cindiPreston.jpg]](http://brotherhoodofdoom.com/Images_Global/greg/cindiPreston.jpg)
There's a faus pax in there, glynch - Drunk Monk - 06-16-2008
nice to know some things are eternal.
long live the faus pax kid!!!